Struggles

I'm struggling today.  Losing weight takes so much effort and to be honest, I'm feeling a little resentful about it!  It takes a lot of time to plan out your eating for the day...calculate points, write everything down.

Keeping a food log is essential on the Weight Watcher program.  I try to follow the rules exactly in hopes that this will lead to success.  It is very tedious.  Especially since what I'd really like to do, is just eat and forget it!

I had 28 points left after lunch.  I made burgers (no buns), mac & cheese and fresh green beans  for dinner.  I had to weigh my turkey burgers and then I had to calculate the points for the mac & cheese.  The nutritional information on the box is for the DRY MIX!  Now, I don't know about you, but I don't eat mac & cheese right out of the box.  I like to cook mine first!  You have to add milk and butter (or margarine).  So, I spent about 15 minutes trying to figure out how many points one half of a cup of mac & cheese was with 1% milk and real butter!  By the time I measured out my portion and calculated out the points.....I didn't even want to eat it! 

After eating 2 turkey burgers (I was hungry!), the 1/2 cup of mac & cheese and a healthy portion of fresh steamed green beans mixed with olive oil and balsamic vinegar....I had 3 points left!  That was a 25 point dinner and it wasn't even worth it!

This is why I really wanted to do a "pre packaged" diet like Jenny Craig or Nutrisystem.  Because of all the preparation (planning,weighing and measuring and journaling), it makes me feel as though I'm thinking about food ALL DAY LONG!  And you know what...I am!

I've learned from my previous stints with Weight Watchers, that as time goes on I won't need to "think" so much as it will become more of a habit than a chore.  But right now, all I know is that I'm thinking about food way more than I want to.  I'm tired of thinking about food when I get up....when I get to work....when my stomach is making those weird sounds, when I get home....blah, blah, blah.

I'd like to eat like a normal person....just for awhile, to see what it's like.